I didn't know Chris Farley well. We only talked four or five times.

But when he came home for Christmas in the mid-nineties he was riding the high of Tommy Boy. He was an SNL star and to us Madisonian's he had it all.

I was hanging at a bar I hung at like a coat someone forgot, which was not far from Chris's parents house. He was all fun and games until later in the evening, when he got rather introspective.

Chris had lost a part in a movie because no one would take him seriously. He was depressed.

We, the not star people, were taken aback. How could this successful funny-man not be happy?

I guess this question has stuck with me, or I wouldn't be writing this all these years removed.

Chris was very empathetic, he took pain and made it funny. The part that sticks with me is: He wanted to be taken seriously, he was sure he could pull it off. But no one would give him the chance.

He was gold as the fat funny guy. He seemed hurt and trapped by the myopic view of his talents.

He was easy to get emotional... Sure he was in a red sport jacket that was made for a little guy and he was funny in spurts. But a sadness seemed to hang in the air around him.

Are comedians more empathetic? I'm sure the answer is no if you say "all comedians". But it seems some of them are more in tune with their surroundings, turning bad news into lemonade.

In retrospect it seems Chris wanted the world to know there was more to him than just his girth and willingness to give it all for the laugh.

I don't think he's alone in the comedy field. There seem to be a lot of demons bubbling near the surface.

A lucky few have made the switch from pure funny man to drama. Bill Murray, Steve Martin and Robin Williams come to mind. But the majority don't get the opportunity and small minority of those that do? People don't want to see them that way, we're unwilling to suspend disbelief.

We want funny people funny...

I've noticed many funny people are more perceptive, smarter than the average. George Carlin took deep topics and turned them into laughs.

My point is Chris Farley was a genuinely nice person. And in the few times we met, I felt him to be too sensitive.

A trait that may run in many comics, some that died too young.

***

As this is kind of a downer allow me to end with an upper.

I was at a bar that no longer exists, well, a new one does exist, but it doesn't count.

Adam Sandler had done a show that night and Chris was on-hand for a cameo.

They became "guest" bartenders at Buck's Madison Square Garden in Madison.

I ordered a rum and coke from Chris.

He said that sounded good.

He promptly made it... and drank it.

I didn't get my drink from Chris.