The Dallas Cowboys Crowned 2009 NFL Champs!

The sports writers and NFL analysts have awarded the Dallas Cowboys The Best Team in the NFL Trophy.

For the third time this year they have made it clear they have an raging boner for the Cowboys. The week prior to the Packers brutal anal probing, the Cornboys were pronounced the best.

With complete disregard for two unbeaten teams and a myriad of evidence to the contrary, they did not allow the facts to stand in the way of their man-crush on the Cowboys.

Only a few weeks after they were used as mops to clean up Lambeau field, the announcers once again got major stiffys as the Cornhole Cowboys limped into the playoffs and beat the Eagles.

Again, they announced the Cowgirls were the best team in the NFC. This must have been news to the #1 and #2 seeds: The Saints and Vikings respectively.

Upon being bitch slapped around Minnesota the Cowboys looked dazed and confused as they stared up at the jumbotron. Them pictures up yonder is the guys in purple administering a good ol' fashion ass-kickin'.

The writers and experts held firm that the Cowpies were still the best team in the NFC.

Immediately following the Super Bowl, which New Orleans won, the Sport Writers and NFL analysts came out of the closet to announce in a very whiny voice:

We don't care who won this game. The Cowboys are America's bestest team. We are pronouncing them the bestest team in the NFL and are calling for all the games they lost to be stricken from the record and for the Cowboys to face the Saints in the first annual Super-Duper Bowl, sponsored by Preparation H.

The Super-Duper Bowl will be played in Dallas and the final score will be Dallas 35, Saints 33... And thus they will be the bestest team ever.

The Super-Duper Bowl will be immediately followed by the awarding of the trophy to Tony Romo and a post-game dry-humping.